Why love failed you again

The thing about losing youth is that you lose your faith in the second chances. I wish I could be more hopeful about love and everything that I love about finding, falling and hurting in love. The bit about hurting in love, it's the bit that you're never warned about. I never learnt to ask myself the question as to why anyone who loves would hurt the one they love.

Life doesn't come with an instruction manual and this is what you figure along the way. There has been some old pain that keeps coming up, from years ago. This upheaval brings with it some tears, some unresolved trauma because this girl feels a little too much and always a little too deeply. But she's making the progress to slowly heal herself and tell herself that it's ok to love and feel the pain.

Between the process, of healing, unhealing, becoming and unbecoming. I've tightened the reins around my heart and widened the moat to my castle. This is the way of the world, that I don't choose to embrace, but will comply until I find a better way out.